"that the bonds of matrimony heretofore and now existing between the parties are dissolved and forever set aside, and that the plaintiff is granted a divorce from the defendant."
and that was it. my marriage of 18 years, which i thought would be forever, was over.
at the beginning of 2011, my husband decided he needed a change in his life, so he abandoned me. divorce papers were filed in the middle of the year. by the end of 2011, a divorce was granted. the most devastating change of my life had occurred.
this is the reason i have been missing in action from this blog, so forgive me. at times, i wasn't sure i was going to make it through the hardness of what i was going through. at one point i wondered, if i had a choice, what would i choose: the year of hell i went through in 1987 when i was in a car accident that left me paralyzed, when i sustained multiple internal injuries which almost took my life over and over and over again, when i spent 6 1/2 months in the hospital just trying to live....or would i choose the year of hell i went through in 2011. in my mind i chose 1987.
now that the pain of what i have endured is not so raw (it's still there, just not as intense!) and time is passing, i'm not sure which trial i would go through if i had a choice. all i do know is that divorce is more painful...
through this change in my life, i am learning many great and wonderful things. i've learned that i am stronger than i ever thought. i've learned i can do really hard things. i've learned that i will not break. i've learned kindness, humility, love, patience and hope. i've learned, amidst the most terrible experience i've been a part of, life is still good. have you ever heard the expression "what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger?" if that statement is true, here's how i feel i should look right about now...
hee! hee! hee!
anyway, i'm making some changes. i've updated my website at www.oop-steph.com and if you haven't notice, i've made a few changes to my blog. the title is the main change. i think it suits me better. i never liked the old title anyway...
change is good.
I have been a " silent observer" for way too long now. Yes, I have known Stephanie for many years. Met her just a year or so after the accident. I have seen incredible strength, sadness, sickness, happiness, laughter, organization, determination, sense of humor, loyalty - well, you name it, she is a "Hero" to many of us. We just don't take the time to tell you, Stephanie. Thank you for your life, your example of love and kindness, your will to live and to give back to others (even when it seems you can't go on yourself) and thank you for reminding me to count my blessings every day! Remember every day that you have "fans" cheering you on!! You are incredible!
ReplyDeletethank you debbie. you made me cry! i appreciate your beautiful comments...
ReplyDeleteYou amaze me Steph! I pray 2012 will bring you peace, joy, success and tons of new adventures!
ReplyDeletethanks cheri! hope things are good for you. i've enjoyed being able to keep in touch with you a little more this past year--let's keep it up!
DeleteDivorce is no fun. Hopefully 2012 will be a fresh start. I'm so happy I've met you!
ReplyDeletei'm so glad i met you too, girl-with-a-great-name! how are you? i hope all is well and you're continuing to heal...
DeleteI understand, divorce is like Death something i never thought would happen to me but i saw all the same things you did. It made me stronger and taught me so much about myself. My relationship w my savior grew so much threw it. I was remarried in the Bountiful Temple this past Jan.
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